Sunday, February 21, 2010

Good News of Great Joy

It is my pleasure to announce the beginning of a Nursing Mothers Room, a clean, comfortable, private space for mothers to nurse their babies on Sunday mornings at St. John's Lutheran Church in Des Moines, Iowa.

They may need rocking chairs, I don't know. If they do I'll let you know and perhaps you could help. But in the meantime, I am basking in this beautiful sign of hope. That babies are born. And that they are welcome at our church. This is the kind of church to which I want to belong.

It will be formally announced next Sunday but I heard about it today and got permission to blog on the subject because the idea is so lovely. As with many things, nursing and me have a mixed history. I did it, barely, for three months, with much pain, and just when I figured it out I "had" to go back to work and so I quit nursing because the idea of pumping was waaaay out of the realm of my abilities.

Meanwhile, a dear colleague pumped in the office supply closet so she could continue nursing after her leave was over. She put a sign on the door that said something like "Stay Out." So we desk workers had to wait before we could retrieve our necessary paper clips, pens, and folders. The dark little room with dusty shelves was more sanitary than pumping in a bathroom stall, she said. I wish I had that tenacity. All I could do was stop nursing at three months, when I had to return to work.

"Had" to return to work???? Did I really "have" to return to work? That is the irony of it all because in hindsight the answer is no. At the time, I had this Midwestern protestant work ethic that said a firm yes. (By the way, that's another thing I'm at odds with -- the Midwestern protestant work ethic. Another blog for another time.) It's interesting to me now, having been laid off, thinking about "having" to go to work. What it really means to "have" to work. And the truth is, if I could rewind my life and change two things, they would be to nurse my two children longer than three months. Even four months. I mean, would the universe have stopped just because I took four months maternity leave, rather than three months?

So when I found out today that St. John's is starting a Nursing Mother's Room, I swelled up with joy. It's simply such a special time. And for a community -- it's special for everyone because that new little life is our hope. And now we can authentically say, you are welcome here.

And the poetic justice is that 10 and 13 years after nursing, my kids need me more than ever. And now is when I can be with them because I am not dealing in paper clips and files and futility. With a hundred thousand thanks to being eliminated and terminated. Paying bills is a good thing. And it's even better when you don't have to sell your soul to do it. If at all possible.

Thanks for coming over to the Charmer Blog. I wish you all a wonderful week of work and priorities and taking care of babies.

With love, T